Every day, kids and teens make decisions that affect them, their families and their friendships. Help your kids or teens understand how to make good choices and then be able to solve problems peacefully.
A good choice is:
- True to your values
- A positive force in your life
- Good for you and the people around you
- Self-esteem building
- Right for you, even if it’s not what everyone else is doing
- Not always obvious
Making good choices takes practice. There are no guarantees that the choices a child makes will be successful, but that is how they grow and learn.
5 Steps to Making Good Choices When Solving A Problem Are:
- First of all, calm down and find out what the problem really is. Don’t just assume you know what the problem is, but go directly to the other person that is involved. Don’t accept rumors or gossip from other family members or friends.
- Second, be willing to really listen to each other’s side of the disagreement or problem. Promise each other that you will not interrupt when the other side is telling their story. This is very hard to do, but by really listening to each other, you can avoid any assumptions that either of you may have.
- Third, gather all the facts so you can make a good choice. Explore other possible choices. Which is the best?
- Fourth, think about all the possible choices (good and bad) you have before you act. Ask yourself what will happen if you make a particular choice. How will it affect you right now or next week? Remember, that good choices fit who you are-your beliefs and values.
- Fifth, talk about which choice will be the best solution for both of you, and if you don’t know, then ask someone for help like a parent, teacher, or school counselor. Many times, both of you can make a compromise, which means you both give a little to get a little. In other words, you both come out winners. Once a decision has been made, stick with it, and try to see how it works.
Suggested Readings For Parents and Children:
- What’s The Recipe For Friends (Book for Kids)
- Good Friends Are Hard To Find: Help Your Child Make & Keep Friends (Book for Parents and Kids)
- Friends Stick Together (Book for Kids)
- Learning To Be A Good Friend: A Guidebook for Kids (Book for Kids)
- “New Moon” Friendship-How to Make, Keep, And Grow Your Friendships
- Heartprints (Book for Kids)
- Cap It Off With A Smile (Book for Kids)
- How To Lose All Your Friends (Book for Kids)
- I’m Terrific (Book for Kids)
- Cliques, Phonies, & Other Baloney (Book for Kids)
- Getting With It: A Kid’s Guide To Forming Good Relationships and “Fitting In” (Book for Kids)
- Too Smart For Trouble (Book for Kids)
- Strong, Smart, And Bold-Empowering Girls For Life (Book for Parents)
- Raising Cain: Protecting the Emotional Life Of Boys (Book for Parents)
- Nobody Knew What To Do (Book for Parents and Kids)
- Why Is Everybody Always Picking On Me: A Guide To Handling Bullies (Book for Kids)
- Sticks And Stones: 7 Ways To Deal With Teasing, Conflict, And Other Hard Times (Book for Parents)